Archive for the ‘Men & Women’ Category

My husband passed away last night

Mary Clancy goes up to Father O’Grady after his Sunday

morning service, and she’s in tears. He says, “So what’s

bothering you, Mary my dear?” She says, “Oh, Father,

I’ve got terrible news. My husband passed away last

night.” The priest says, “Oh, Mary, that’s terrible. Tell me,

Mary, did he have any last requests?” She says, “That

he did, Father.” “The priest says, “What did he ask,

Mary?” She says, “He said, ‘Please Mary, put down that

damn gun.'”

The kidnapper makes his final offer

A Man’s wife was kidnapped by someone

Next day the kidnapper calls the man and asks for $30k to release her but the man doesn’t show much interest.

Some days later kidnapper calls again and reduces the amount to $20k but again the man doesn’t look like he’s interested in the offer.

This continues on till the time the kidnapper makes his final offer.

On Phone –

Kidnapper : here’s the final offer, you give me one thousand dollars or I’ll send her back to you.

Man – Deal!

I love you!

Raju: I love you!

Girl: hurrrrr..

Raju: I’ll even die for you.

Girl: hurrrrr…

Raju: I can’t live without you.

Girl: hurrrrr…

Raju : I even bought a diamond ring for you.

Girl: Really?

Raju: hurrrrrr…

A sign of growing equality

Visiting Afghanistan for a second time, a war correspondent noted that since the fall of the Taliban, wives who used to walk ten paces behind their husbands were now walking ten paces in front. The journalist asked one of the men if this was a sign of growing equality.

“No”, the man replied. “Land-mines.”

What else can u leave?

Girl: If we got married, you’ve to stop smoking.
Boy: OK!

Girl: Drinking too.
Boy: OK!

Girl: N going to the night club too.
Boy:- Yes..

Girl:- What else can u leave??
(After Thinking Much…)
Boy:- The idea of marrying You

Work with animals all day

on a date I told my new girl friend,
me – “I get to work with animals all day”
She – “How sweet! What do you do?”
me – “I’m a butcher.”

Want to end our relationship!

Girlfriend: I want to end our relationship, I am going to return you everything you gave me..
Boyfriend: What a joke? Okay then, let’s start with Kisses..!!!”.

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